Meme-O-Rama
From a
random blog obained access from
Ian's site, I've decided to do a Meme (an idea that spreads around and people copy....for you thick people). The Meme is quite simple: 13 films, 13 quotes, you need to guess them, and no cheating. Some are dead easy. Others: a bit tricky. All of which I love, and have seen most of them more than once. So here goes:-
- Uh, well, if anyone from the, uh, from the IRS is watching, I... forgot to file my, my, my 1040 return. Um, I meant to do it today, but, uh...
- But I, being poor, have only my dreams. I have spread my dreams under your feet. Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.
- He does fit the profile perfectly. He's intelligent, but an under-achiever; alienated from his parents; has few friends. Classic case for recruitment by the Soviets.
- Anyway, like I was sayin', shrimp is the fruit of the sea. You can barbecue it, boil it, broil it, bake it, saute it. Dey's uh, shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo. Pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried. There's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich. That- that's about it.
- You want a prediction about the weather, you're asking the wrong Phil. I'll give you a winter prediction: It's gonna be cold, it's gonna be grey, and it's gonna last you for the rest of your life.
- I know Ms. Pac-Man is special. She's fun. She's cute. She swallows.
- Holy shit dude. I found a dildo. Dildo. Dildo. Dildo. Big blue rubber dicks for everyone. The people demand rubber dicks.
- I'd like to share a revelation that I've had during my time here. It came to me when I tried to classify your species. I realized that you're not actually mammals. Every mammal on this planet instinctively develops a natural equilibrium with the surrounding environment, but you humans do not. You move to an area, and you multiply, and multiply, until every natural resource is consumed. The only way you can survive is to spread to another area. There is another organism on this planet that follows the same pattern. A virus. Human beings are a disease, a cancer of this planet, you are a plague, and we are the cure.
- Many a mecha has gone to the end of the world... never to come back! That is why they call the end of the world 'Man-hattan'
- Stay in school and use your brain. Be a doctor, be a lawyer, carry a leather briefcase. Forget about sports as a profession. Sports make ya grunt and smell. See, be a thinker, not a stinker.
- Throw me the idol. No time to argue. Throw me idol, I'll throw you the whip.
- Wonderful girl. Either I'm going to kill her or I'm beginning to like her.
- Fool of a Took! Throw yourself in next time, and rid us of your stupidity.
And there you have it. Leave what you think the answers are in the comments box, and no cheating.
A Ding Ding Ding Ding Ding......
Seriously, what is so crazy about
"The Crazy Frog". Basically, it's a ringtone that is constantly advertised on daytime telly as being the best ringtone in the history of the world, ever (despite the fact that I have never heard it off the advert - the cool kids like me have the
Little Britain ringtone). Anyway, it does my head in everytime I see it,
and I'm not the only one.
Basically, for the unaware. Crazy Frog is a ringtone advertised by Jamster in which a frog like creature makes a similar noise to this 'Insanity Test'. Sure you'll agree when you listen to it: who the hell would have that as a ringtone? Apparently, people do. But, whilst watching the advert for the fifty millionth time today on a random music channel, I once again asked the question that has been bugging me for months now:-
Is that what I think it is?
If it is, the frog community must be a bit miffed that one of their own has been portrayed in less than favourable proportions. I'd be on the phone to the television bosses. But they've probably already got a headache. Can you show frogs willies on telly? Suppose nature shows show batrachian intercourse. However, and my biology only stretches to a 'D' at A Level, but that wang looks awfully human like.
That's assuming it is a penis. I mean, it could be something altogether more innocent, like an udder or a flap of skin. But what do you all think?
In Other News: S got her first googlewhack: Ribosomes Effervesce! I've picked up the pace as well with antiestablishmentarianism warlords. Big long whack right there. Needless to say: I'm chuffed to bits.
Fire in the Disco
Yesterday at about 9pm, I had a knock on the door. It's not out of the ordinary, but unusual, as I know it could of been nobody I knew (they were already at the pub. I was getting ready myself).
Standing at the door, for which you ladies will be insanely jealous, was a big strapping fireman.
"Excuse me mate, but I'm asking you that it will be advisable for you to leave the premises."
Advisable to leave the premises? Did that make me smirk. Imagine if the captain on the Titanic said "Listen guys. We've just hit an iceberg. You can stay if you want, that's super. But my reccommendation is that it'll be advisable to jump in the life boats. Thanks ever so much!". Advisable my arse.
Nevertheless, I was nearly ready to go out (and I never argue with anybody who is tougher than me. Just ask my mum), so after about five minutes, I informed the fireman that I was ready to leave. And so begins: the world's most half assed evacuation.
The reason for the "evacuation" was due to a fire at an old petrol station just down the road from me. They feared that the fumes from old tyres and fuel may just drift over to our house. Which is wierd. I had never known the garage being there, even though I walk past it everyday. Probably because I don't drive, I don't notice garages. Garages to me are for microwavable snacks, 2 for 1 on Citrus Punch Oasis, and Cliff Richard calenders. Nevertheless, this garage was on fire, and bellowing smoke into the air. The firefighters had it under control.
Being me, I thought this was a big event. So I rang me mum to keep an eye out on the local news for any information. She replied with "Your house better be insured Rhys Wynne."
Nice to see where her priorities lie!
In other news: finally got a good look at the bloggie nominations. Vote for me! Also, vote for this in best article, this for best British Blog, this for best LGBT site (largely due I hung around in the comments section whilst waiting for the bandwidth issues to unbreak themselves) and whatever the hell else in the other categories. Just vote for me. Or I'll cry.
Two Timing
Well bugger me. I've done it again.
After whoring myself more times than a cheap prostitute, and thanks to the rather close knit community surrounding this site, I've got meself another bloggie nomination in "Best Tagline".. Thanks for nominating me guys. You all rule.
To be perfectly honest, I knew earlier on today. I had two emails from the owner saying I was up (which kinda got me all excited. What else was I voted on? Sweet fuck all apparently.). However, the website has been down for longer time than a cheap prostitute. Suffering from bandwidth issues - which is talked about breifly in one of the nominees for the "Best article or essay about Blogs" Bloggie. Oh the irony. So I'd thought I'd save the posting of this entry which says "Wow! I'm up for a bloggie!" for when the site is back up, to maximise the reader/votage curve. I'm not making the same mistakes as last year.
So, as the veteran. All I can say is vote for me. It would be nice to win, and being up two years in a row is an achievement. Shows creative staying power. What will I give in return? Dunno. Have a joke.
A byte walks into a bar and says "Pint please. I need it.". Barman says "Why? What's wrong?". Byte goes, "Well, I am usually 11111111, today I am 11111110.". Barman goes "Yeah, you do look a bit off."
Don't make the same mistake as last year. Vote for the gospel.
Whacking Your Google
Sorry for the delay of post. My week has been spent doing exams; revising; not revising; drinking; playing darts; playing poker; spending quality time with
S; falling asleep on S (yes, at times, even
I can be a shit of a boyfriend); eating more takeaway than's good for me; getting so hammered after my exams by using a computer, past exam papers and abusing the bars "2 4 1 if you bring in your exam papers" (this led to the falling asleep on S stage); trying to sort out moving away from my job in the zoo by applying for a position in the...errr....zoo (it's a different area altogether);
selling for gig tickets on eBay (and not seeing a penny of any potential profits); and googlewhacking.
Yes, I am now a googlewhacker, and I'm so proud of myself.
It all started yesterday, me and S watched Dave Gorman's Googlewhack Adventure (a present I gave to my brother, then later nicked. Even I can be a shit of a brother). Afterwards, we were talking aimlessly and suddenly the words "nipples coleslaw" came up. I had to check if it was a googlewhack (two words put into a search engine that yeild only one result), but alas no. Later, in the pub, the words "telekinesis masturbation" came up. As lovely a googlewhack that would of been, it isn't too. But it doesn't matter, I was away.
The next 15 minutes, between ordering two pizzas (half of it is still in the kitchen downstairs), and eating two pizzas, me, S and Guy were furiously googlewhacking away. And then, I did it. I really did it.
There, ladies and gentlemen, is a googlewhack. And not a fake one I created myself. A real, living, breating googlewhack, as placed on googlewhack.com:-
Needless to say, I was a happy happy man. I tried emailing the page owner, but it got bounced back. Which is a shame.
One thing that did strike me was Google's sponsored links. Basicallly, whilst immaturely searching for a masturbation googlewhack, I noticed this:-
Apologies to my mother at this point, who is reading this. But it says "Free Masturbation Site". Who pays for masturbation (not including prostitution)? Answers on a postcard please.
Chica-Cherry-Cola
I was out in town with S and a few friends, and - feeling peckish - we thought we'd treat ourselves to a pub lunch from Spoons. Fuck it, we've been not working hard at revision, so we deserve something nice. I ordered scampi and chips with coke (was planning revision), for which the barman asked a question
"Is Pepsi okay?"
Is Pepsi okay? You know, it really doesn't make that much difference to me. Pepsi and Cola are like a mother's children: they are different, but I like them equally, and I couldn't choose between them. However, when I'm feeling dangerous, I may just go like this in a bar:-
"One Coke please mate"
"Okay. Is Pepsi alright?"
"Actually no.....I think I'll take my business elsewhere. Good day."
So, anybody got any reason why they say it (we think it's to cover their arses due to trade's description)? Also, does anybody actually love one of the brands and hates the other?
In other news, revision hasn't been going too well for my Computer Architecture exam on Monday, here's what I've been doing to pass the time: -
Bought Civilization III. May have spent just a little too much money on it, as I felt I needed to play as the Welsh. As you cannot play as them on the original (or even the Celts), I felt I needed to get into the game. To achieve this, I needed to play as Wales. Damn you national pride!
Bought Equilibrium on DVD. Yes, I know I slated it ages ago. Hell, I was young, I was stupid. I felt that I was overly harsh (remember, this was before the second two Matrix movies came out, and it stands up better that), so it deserved a second viewing. Lo and behold, the second viewing was brilliant (it was on telly a few months ago), so I decided to buy it. It's a fucking amazing movie! Would reccommend going to get it (unless you're my brothers, and as such you can lend it anytime).
Downloaded every single Royal Rumble between 1988 and 2000 (2001+ I have on DVD). Unfortunately, I cannot find 1997 anywhere on the internet. Any clues as to where I can get it?
Changed the title image. People were being scared by the eye (including S, who usually says I have nice eyes), so I decided to default setting it to a lovely picturesque view over the North Wales coast. Should you wish to be scared shitless, you can now change the title image using the "Change The Title" links below. Enjoy!
One final thing stopped me from revising over the weekend, but pictures speak a thousand words:-
Mum, Ian, can you hear me? YOUR BOYS TOOK ONE HELL OF A BEATING!
Find Me And Follow Me....
Tonight the
Brit Awards Nominees were announced. For those of you unaware, the Brits are a music version of the Oscars, which represents probably the most fair and unbiased look at all that's best in British music. Unsurprisingly, The Darkness pretty much cleaned up last year, much the same way Robbie Williams, Oasis, The Verve, The Spice Girls, Radiohead and The Happy Mondays have. With the exception of The Spice Girls (yes, I am a closet Robbie Williams fan. Don't like it? Go fuck yourselves), each one of those bands are amazing (in their day - later Radiohead stuff is a bit ropey which made me want to become a member of the defenestrating suicide club). So, unsurprisingly this band get a load of nominations: -
This band for those of you who are unaware is Franz Ferdinand. Named after some guy who's killing kicked off World War I, Franz Ferdinand are the media's latest darling in rock music.
Only one problem, they are shit.
Okay. Let me rephrase that without getting my balls cut to buggery by music fans everywhere. They're not shit, they're average. They're the sort of band that people who read NME love. I'm sorry, but NME thinks Bjork running her fingernails up and down a piece of bark is good music. NME listen to things that they think are new, and unique (with Franz Ferdinand being uniquely average), so they look cool. I'm sorry, but in my eyes, and this hurts me to say, but Franz Ferdinand are not the saviour to rock music. They're just a pretty average band with an occasional catchy song that gets played in clubs as the "Indie part", before returning to dance bollocks. And for 3 and a half minutes, I listen to "Take Me Out", dancing like a fool, because I think that there will be a string of Indie Rock songs to play us out until the early hours.
Except that's there isn't. So I'm left clutching to this fairly average Glaswegian quartet.
Don't think I'm having a go at the Brits, oh no. There are some quality bands nominated multiple times: Keane, Snow Patrol, Jet, Muse and Scissor Sisters have all be nominated. For anybody wanting to know what I like as far as music goes, I reccommend checking those bands out.
Well, them and Feeder, who I love because they're Welsh, and rock.
But, going back to the Brits. Where is Damien Rice? I mean, a great writer left out of prestigious awards. WE WOULDN'T WANT THAT NOW, WOULD WE NUDGE NUDGE WINK WINK.
In other news: One of my mates has joined a vexillology society, which is apparently the study of flags. And he takes the piss out of me.
Argh!!!
To quote
Dave Gorman: -
"When you are writing a novel, everything else just seems so much more important. I mean, I couldn't start mine until I checked my email, defrosted the refridgerator, painted the fence and went to Germany and back"
Okay, so I'm not writing a novel, but I am revising for my third year exams. I'm trying, I really, really am, but I suddenly thought "hmmmm....my blog could really use a resdesign.". So here it is.
Maybe now I can do some revision. Please don't tell me any problems with for two weeks, or my degree will be down the shitter.
There is one thing you can help me with though. Some blogs on blogspot have icons in the title-bar when browsing in Firefox. Anybody know how I can get one on mine? I know it's something to do with favicon.ico, that's not the problem. The problem is how I can upload it onto blogspot.
In other news: I'm featured on Bash's bastard godchild. Vote for me in that!
Whilst you're voting: Help right the wrong of last year, and vote for me in a 2005 bloggie (tagline especially. Ta).
Me? Humble? Never!
Okay, it was a goal. You lot bleeding happy now? I'm humble, it should of been 1-0 Spurs. But it wasn't. Get over it.
In other news: vote for me in the bloggies "Tagline Category", and I'll be your best friend for ever!
It's That Time Again!
2005 Bloggies! As regular readers may know, I had a shot at winning one last year
in the "Best Tagline" category, and it's been hard choosing people to vote for. Real hard. A lot of good blogging friends have stopped (
Max, Liz and a few others), and I haven't really replaced them. Mainly people who I know personally (
Ian,
Peter etc.). So, I've decided this year to share my nominations, and the reasons why:-
Best Application
W.Bloggar - If you are not using this at the moment, why not? It's brilliant piece of software.
Best British/Irish Weblog
Darkside/Lightside - I've never voted for it before, so I'd thought I'd give it a nod.
Honestly I'm Sober - Unbelievably frank blog. I don't comment on it, but it's compelling. Also in best design category.
Thoughts of A Cymro - Okay, it's a nod for a mate of mine. I don't care.
Best American Weblog
Cynsim.com - Forever brilliant. Very interesting, plus the most attractive 30+ I know. Also voted in "Best Kept Secret"
Gorillamask.net - Not a blog technically, but still brilliant regular musings.
A New York Escort Confessions - A guilty pleasure. My mum reads this blog, and I don't talk about it, but I love this blog. Pisses over Belle De Jour (although, if you're a regular, you'll know she's not into that sorta thing)..
Best LGBT
Do You Believe In Me? - Some of it is brilliant. The rest of the time he suffers blogger fatigue. Must be good, as only good bloggers like myself suffer from it. Also voted in "Best LGBT Blog".
Best Tagline
The Gospel - I. Want. This. Award.
Best Photography
Fern-Georgina - Hope this blog comes back, otherwise my nomination is going to look very silly.
Adam Sputnik - I love landscapes, so obvious nod to the Aussie.
Arkestra - I really like the photolog in this. Don't know why.
As I cannot be arsed typing anymore, I also gave nods to Scaryduck (most humourous), Punclox (best group), and Uptonia (best design).
So that's it. Kept best blogs of the year secret. You are all my favouries!
For the next few days I will be whoring myself off to vote for me. I don't want to direct your attention to any particular category, but I would like to right the wrong caused last year, and win the best tag line. Still feel like Tenth Muse screwed me out of it.
Bitter? Yep. You can still see the teethmarks. Ba dum tish!
Happy 2006!!!
To be honest, the relatively quiet night at a friends house was a pretty good way to see in the new year. It was fun, and didn't make too much of an arse of myself, unlike a mate of mine. This was a legitamate conversation between me and him on
MSN earlier today. Only one person noticed his mistake, and - unfortunately for him - that person has a fairly successful blog.
As he doesn't know about this site, I've changed his name to something dark and mysteriousy. Also, the conversation has been edited quite badly, as we went off on one talking about what would happen if the fruit kingdom would have a fight, who would win (common sense says the Pinapple).
Rhys: Hey Mr XXX
Mr XXX: Hey. How was your New Years?
Rhys: Not bad (insert long description of how your night went. It would make no sense to you people. Trust me). Yours?
Mr XXX: Pretty good. How have the first 12 hours of 2005 been treating you?
Rhys: Errr mate....there's been more than 12 hours of 2005.
Mr XXX: Bullshit!
Rhys: Yeah, check the date on the clock.
Mr XXX: Shit! You mean I've missed a day?!?!?
Rhys: Yeah.....errr.....sorry.
Dunno if that beats Chester, but by jove, it'll be close.
2004: A Look Back.....
....bollocks to 2004. I'm sorry, I'm sick of these reviews of "ooh, 2004 was good for me etc.". Okay, yeah, 2004 was good for me,
making this website (which - 4 months after completion - I've found out doesn't work on Firefox. Oops) and general working for
Active Presence over the summer (which lead to me being STEP Merseyside Champion) was one highlight.
S has been another, making me a very happy Welshman. And then there were the odd days and nights out too numerous to mention here. Most involved me wearing a skirt and/or spending far too much time on bouncy castles.
But then, there have been bad parts. Well, not bad parts, just niggly things. Having no idea what to do after university. The brown nosing of Franz Ferdinand (who are not as good as everybody says they are). The return of Peter Andre. WWE Smackdown being shite since Wrestlemania 20. All have put a dampner on the year.
So, in closing. 2004 was good, but it's past now. Here's to 2005!
In other news: Ally said that just looking at the alcohol in a previous post made her feel sick. I can now inform everybody that ingesting said alcohol made me feel just as bad.
But, that's what new years are for, aren't they?
