Firefox to Paypal: You Fraud!
Forgive me for being a big dirty fanboy, but Firefox is amazing, no doubt about it. I had my brother come upto me and say that the Script Kiddies in his class thought IE7 was better "because it has tabs". I promptly disowned him.
However, it does have it's moments.
Cue the anti phishing device. A email from e-bay perked my interest, I clicked on the link (paypalchristmas.co.uk), and the Firefox anti-phishing device kicked in.
Oooh, nice of Firefox to protect me, but there's one problem - the site is legit.
I've fired off an e-mail to paypal, enquiring about it, and I don't blame Firefox - after all, it's better to be safe than sorry. But it has amused me greatly. How does Firefox decide what is phishing and what isn't? Is it user based? There's a button underneath the "Ignore this Warning" which has the words "this site isn't phishing", is there a way of saying that a site is phishing? If there is, what's there to stop 100's of Firefox fanboys going to, say, Amazon and saying that it is a phishing site?
Now that - whilst bad for Amazon - would be rather impressive.*
* I cannot be held responsible should Amazon go out of business overnight....
EDIT: Just got this e-mail from Paypal, just to be sure.
Dear Rhys Wynne,
Thank you for contacting PayPal in relation to a Christmas Promotion
that we have in place at the moment.
I can confirm Mr. Wynne, that this is an official PayPal email and web address.
[Promotional Blurb Here]
Sincerely,
Laura
Resolution Services Department
PayPal, an eBay Company
So there you go!
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GATR Christmas 2006 Underway! Bounty Exchange and Christmas Cards
Friends, Bloggers, Countrymen. Remind me, just how bleeding old am I?
Yes, sandwiched between my CD ROM drive and a flag of the nation which is named after a fish with the biggest dick in the ocean is my 2006 Advent Calendar. I neglected one last yaer - and I lived to regret it, with a certain ex housemate of mine scoffing down Fimbles shaped chocolate last year. Made my shredded wheat most unappealing. Which leads me to this years advent calendar.
The more observant amongst you may see that it is a Celebrations Advent Calendar. The reason being is that it's cheap, and the only one left in the shop that didn't make me look like a peadophile walking around Colwyn Bay with it under my arm. Now, I'm sure you're wondering "ooh, I'll bet he list his chocolates in an order, with his least favourite at the bottom." And you'd be right. The official GATR League Table for Chocolate in Celebrations is: -
- Galaxy Truffle
- Teasers
- Snickers
- Galaxy
- Topic
- Mars
- Galaxy Caramel
- Milky Way
- Bounty
I fucking hate Bounty, which is where you come in. Anybody want a Bounty Exchange? All offers considered. I will mail you my Bounty on the 27th December and you mail me your replacement chocolates too. 3 Bounties won't hurt the impending new year diet!
In other news, I'm reprising a tradition I did a few years ago - the annual GATR Christmas Card list! It's simple - email me with your address and I will send you a christmas card. I would like one back, so I will reply with my address, so you can send one. Do so and you'll feature on my "wall of fame", and be loved forever. I may even put you into my Big Red Book.
Of course, obvious people (such as Han, Guy, Sibley and Sarah) will get one. Tom (if you read this) I'd send you one, but I don't know which country on this god forsaken planet you'll be. So let me know!
28 Days to go!
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You'd Never Guess I Work In IT
In my last post I suggested that I wanted to try
Ubuntu, Yesterday, I:
Spent 8 hours downloading the iso file associated with it.
Borrowed a DVD drive from work.
Realised the DVD drvie wasn't a rewriter, so tried to attach Aled's 30 gig mp3 player to my computer - to transfer the file to the computer downstairs with a CD-RW
Didn't work, so found a program that splits files into "manageable chunks". Split iso into 4 files of around 180 MB each.
Used a 256MB flash disk to transfer the files across.
Burnt the disk.
Inserted it into the computer.
Only to find out I had downloaded the Mac Distribution.
On top of that, I fucked up my forum beyond repair, and neglected to keep any backups. Cue 3 hours restoring my forum to a usable state now from eons old backups.
In happier news - I'm seeing Han in less than two weeks! Her mates want to meet me, as so far to them I appear to be some sort of mythical sexual creation. I can hardly wait!
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The GATR Guide to Partitioning a Brand New Hard Drive Without A Boot Disk or CD Rom
First a little introduction. I recently on a whim purchased a massive 160GB hard disk. It was actually dirt cheap (god bless work contacts), and so I didn't feel too guilty purchasing it. I had no idea what I'd use it for - my porn collection isn't as big as it used to be, so any ideas would be appreciative (was thinking about dual booting it with
Ubuntu, so any Linux advice would be appreciative also). After a big BIOS message in red (which scared the shit out of me), I took out the behemoth, skype'd Han, who calmed me down from my "it's not working" blubbery state, told me exactly what to do, and mocked me for requiring a girl for his computer problems.
Lo and behold, she worked her magic tutorial skills on me, and it worked. In part. Plus point - my computer was starting up. Minus point - I couldn't use it because it was unformatted. Every single tutorial I found required either FDisk (something in Windows 2000 and below), or the XP boot disk (which I do have, however my CD-RW drive is screwed). Nothing on how to do it on a stand alone machine....until I found an unlikely source.
An old .net magazine.
Lo and behold, it worked! Now, as I couldn't find it online, I've taken the liberty to rewrite the article so that it can be here for time to come. Aren't I lovely? Here goes anyway.
1. Bring up the Control Panel, and click on "Administrative Tools"
2. Click on the shortcut icon to Computer Management. It should bring up the following screen.
3. Click on "Storage", then "Disk Management (Local)". The right side of the screen should look similar to this
4. One of the drives (the unformatted drive) should be unallocated (usually the disk1), right click on it and check "Initialize Disk"
5. Right-click the drive and click "New Partition". In the partition wizard you should be asked the Partition Type; specify primary, the partition size; specify the full drive capacity, the drive letter; specify the drive letter you wish to have the drive to be, and the format partition; specify NTFS or FAT32. I'm not going to bore you with the details of it, as if you are able to install a new hard drive, you should be able to know what I've just talked about.
RIght, sorry for the boring entry, but I imagine somebody would find it useful. My life however hasn't been much more blog worthy. I've been working, eating a lot, drinking very little and skyping with the Gorgeous Han all my days. Not exactly mile a minute living, is it?
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Dodgy E-mail and the Ashes
Hey everybody, just a heads up. My e-mail is well and truly fucked at the moment, taking upto 6 hours to deliver an e-mail. Han's given me an earful on how I should use G-Mail as opposed to a POP box based e-mail, but I don't care! I like my POP box, it's ace.
Anyway, in light of my hormonal POP box, I'm pretty much stuck without e-mail for the time being. If you're desperate to get in contact with me, I really do suggest the forum - I do spend an obscene amount of time on there. We're currently undergoing a "Drive for America", after we realised we had none of our Atlantic friends on the board. So - this thanksgiving - why not sign up? It's rather strong community there at the moment, plus probably the best way of getting hold of me. Thanks.
Of course, you could also send me a myspace message or leave me a comment, as I check those regularly, however I'll probably be quicker to respond on the forum. Cheers.
In other news: The Ashes begins today! Lots of Connie bashing will be carried out over the next three days. Unfortunately, it's in Australia, so - at 10 to midnight UK time - we're nearly beginning the days play down under. If only I was a milkman, I'd watch it. Fucking Sky, promoting the "Ashes Live" - but then not saying "ooh, it's held in Australia, so you have to be nocturnal to watch it". Of course I knew this, but I'm sure a lot of people, swept up by the emotion of beating the Aussies and jumped on the bandwagon, didn't.
I'm just tired, and a little angry. I'll shut up now. I'm getting a new hard drive tomorrow! 160Gig!
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Blogging Research, The Ashes, Dentists, Forums and Mybloglog
One thing over the last couple of weekends is that I have not stopped. Seriously, I have been so busy that I haven't had time to reflect over my last two weeks. What with London, Children in Need and the gorgeous Han taking up so much of my life, I've almost become reclusive, so that when I do get time with my mates and my blog I have so much to say, but not enough time to say it. So, this weekend it was rather nice doing fuck all. In fact, it was bliss. I've always been quite a lazy person, so having time to actually do nothing and not feel guilty is nice.
As a result, I managed to get a few things done. Which is what I'm going to talk about here.
First off, I got a new photo for the top of the blog. One thing I gathered during my "blogging research trip to London" (oh no! It wasn't just a holiday with meeting up with bloggers and eating pizza/hugging & kissing them, I worked on getting some Market Research!) was that both Celeste and Han said that the picture up the top right hand corner didn't do such a hunka burning welshman lurve such as myself justice. As such, me and Han managed to get a picture of myself in picadilly circus to use on this here blog. What do you think? One thing me and Han couldn't decide on (awww....our first falling out!) is the blue translucent layer over the picture. Do you think it adds (as I thought) or subtracts (Han's opinion) from the quality of the blog?
Secondly, I joined "Mybloglog", I got the link from that 92 year old blogger on Boing Boing. All I can say is it's a bit like myspace, but for bloggers and website authors. You can join communities linked to the blog, showing the support for sites. As a result, my profile is here, and my communites are here for this blog, here for rhyswynne.co.uk, here for the toplist and here for my forum.
Speaking of my forum, I have spent most of last night on Skype talking to Han. But whilst I was chatting away to her, I also found time to install some games on my forum! They're rather fun and have become a bit of a bragging rights for the community, as they save the high scores. So join up to play them, if you're bored!
Finally, tomorrow I'm off to the dentist for (hopefully) the last time in 6 months. God my teeth are fucked. I'm having to pay for it, but nevermind. Least I'm still NHS baby! Expect for me to be in sheer pain before the Ashes, which start on Thursday. It's the only sport where I (on a technicality) support England, so expect nothing but convict bashing and cricket for the next month or so. I apologise. Profusely.
Children In Need In Colwyn Bay: Or, as my mum said - "OMFG RONAN KEATING!!!!"
Motorhead once sang a song called "A Short History of a Boring Town". He sung it about Colwyn Bay. To quote Del Amitri - "Nothing ever happens, nothing happens at all". It's true though. I've had so much trouble adjusting to life back in Colwyn Bay from London. London was all go, go, go. Colwyn Bay - if life moved any slower - it would be going backwards.
So, imagine our thrill as a town when we realise that the Children in Need concert would be in Wales. We all discussed it in the pub: we didn't give a shit who was playing - we'd go even if the line up was Victoria Beckham, Paris Hilton and Des O'Connor. Turned out the line up was The Feeling, Jamelia, and Ronan Keating. An inoffensive line-up, as my mate said. Tickets were free. Which was good. I left work yesterday to be there early at the "Party for Pudsey" - officially the biggest thing to happen in Colwyn Bay since the Rhiw Road Riots in 1978.
It almost nearly didn't go ahead - high winds on Wednesday meant that the stage collapsed. Luckily, the BBC spread around a bit more taxpayers money to probably the world's most efficient builders to get the stage up and ready for Friday night. All these pictures (and more) are available on my Flickr Site
One thing that suprised us was that the lack of kids at the concert, sure there were a few - but the average age of the concert goers was late teens. At 7pm, during The Pippettes set, they went live on BBC, so we all had to watch the big screen as McFly performed, even the Pippetes, which looked rather surreal.
After The Pippettes left the stage, I manage to get a little bit forward, and The Feeling came on. They were the only band on the list I would've paid to see, they are brilliant. So I was bouncing away when they performed three of their songs: "Fill My Little World", "Never Be Lonely" and "I Love it When You Call (But You Never Call at All)". They then buggered off to do a concert in Liverpool, that's Hardcore.
I should also mention that there were 3 big acts, 1 major act (The Alarm) - who played a good handful of songs, and other artists who appeared. These included Cherry Lee Mewis (who I apparently went to school with), Elin Fflur (from Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantisiliogogogoch), The Pippettes, Will Martin and (I think) somebody else. But we'll concentrate on the main ones.
After a few videos from London of random pop acts I really didn't care much about, Jamelia came on next. My first reaction was "who?!?" (all R & B types kinda blend into one for me), but then she started singing, and my reaction was "oh yeah! Her." I actually don't mind her stuff (considering it's R & B).
Following Jamelia was the main singer: Ronan Keating. My mum's favourite (and Han's 4th favourite). The two compere guys warmed up the cold crowd with Mexican Waves before Ronan. Some of them didn't needing warming up. Bless them, we must've appeared to be an insane (in a bad way) rabble in North Wales. So - thank you Jordan from Old Colwyn for being a screaming chavvy fangirl and making us look like a bunch of complete and utter retards on national television.
Yes, myself and Ronan were on National TV. If you don't believe me, Han took a photo, and she claimed to have seen me. I doubt it though.
All in all, it was a good night. I rang my mum during "Iris" (as she did when she watched the Goo Goo Dolls), and she texted me to say it looked amazing. Considering I didn't really like any of the bands there....it was.
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I Went To London and All I Got.....
I was actually feeling a bit depressed for Saturday, I awoke stupidly early at Guy's at around 7. I lay awake, thinking about how awesome this holiday was. I was with a good mate, and - well - I was thinking about something else. But we'll get onto that a little bit later on. It just felt like a different world down in London. I'm not sure if I was thinking "yes, this is where I want to be" as Celeste put it, but I was thinking "yes, I'd like to experience it more". Four days was just not enough.
Anyway, I got the train at 10 to meet Han. The nerves were replaced by a sense of happiness - Han really was fantastic company, and we got on so well. She even said her night out was canceled - so if I didn't screw it up, the opportunity was there for her to spend an evening in London - something she'd never done before. She said that Covent Garden is full of good restaurants and bars, with the opportunity then to take the second of my bunk beds in my room.
I admit, I was late - some Frenchie was being an arse and I also respectfully observed the two minute silence. I got a text off Han with two words - "BEAT CHOO!!", which just made me smile. We met in Waterloo, and headed to the Tate Modern. Now. I never told Han why I wanted to go there (she had no idea), so I let her in on the secret.....Slides!
She quite cowardly sacrificed her go on the slides to take a picture of yours truly...
It was fast, and it actually hurt my knee going down, my legs were to long to make the turn. As I was nursing an injury from the day before on my right knee, and the slide re-aggravated it.
After seeing the globe, and walking over the millennium bridge, I stole Han's virginity.....her Subway Virginity, that is! She paid for mine too! Though, I was skint, and I did pay her back as we headed for the Trocadero.
The Trocadero has the biggest amusement arcade in London, with some of the best games around. One of them I saw - I had to go on. Mario Kart Arcade. I've never seen it before! Not in Blackpool, not in Llandudno, not anywhere. I just had to play it. It also had extra characters in it from the Pac Man Universe. I was Pac Man, Han was Mario. Like the day before, I won.
Han then said I had to go and do a little bit of shopping. We went to Hamleys, the biggest toystore in London, which was fabulous. They had a Street Fighter 2 Machine for £2,800! Unfortunately, Han declined a challenge. There were far too many cool things in there, which makes this self confessed grown up re-discover his childhood. I took a picture of Han underneath a giraffe, which seemed to piss off a number of Londoners.
Obviously somebody had been dragged in.
We then went to the Apple Store, as Apple Han demanded I'd go there. They had free internet! Though it was too busy. It was one of those cool stores I heard about. Han wanted to buy the Sims, but she couldn't afford it.
Han wanted to show me Camden Market, which is North of the city. I'll be honest, it was like a gothic Eastenders, with lots of scary people dressed up. Some cool t-shirts though. We then found a ungothic cafe, and sat down for a tea/hot chocolate. She said that she would like to go to Covent Garden for a night out, so I said we should head back to my place to drop off my bag, before heading out.
Then what? Well, that story is between myself, Han and the pervy pigeons.
One thing I will say: we never did make it to Covent Garden.
Sunday I awoke early and rather rudely woke up Han. Fuck it, I wasn't going to see her for a while. May as well make use of the little known 7am-8am hour. At around 10, I kissed her goodbye from Waterloo, and prepared for my hugely long journey home.
I admit - it won't be easy being far away from each other. However we do speak loads (we've now progressed onto Skype. It sounds odd but it felt like she was in the room with me!), I'm chuffed to bits with what's happened - Han truly is fabulous. I'm going to Canterbury in Decembertime sometime to see her (and a few of the sights). I've pencilled in a long weekend away from work to see her, and I cannot fricking wait.
Selective Amnesia
Despite having a restless night (I was above the bar and Aussies doing bad kareoke is a horrible thing), I was suprisingly awake for somebody who had zero sleep. Probably because I was meeting Han at South Kensington.
I was almost sick with exctiement as we were going to the Game On exhibition, to play a stupid amount of video games. It was cheap, a lot of fun. I even set the highest score of the exhibition on Street Fighter 2.
Han fancied her chances against me, and - due to a mild case of amnesia. I can't remember the outcome of the Ken vs. Chun Li match.
After about 2 hours of video games and me instigating a major beating on Mario Kart, Han and I plotted to find a Chinese that she liked off Leicester Square. We got the underground to Trafalgar and took a few photos which would've been amazing, if some random woman hadn't spoilt it.
After a little bit of searching we found the Chinese (which future reference Han, it's Lido now don't ever forget the name of it again! Or bookmark this page!), the searching was made worse by the fact I was crippled in one leg, but the chinese made up for it.
I'm generally used to "all you can eat" chinese, but this was different. Kind of like a mini all you can eat.....you order a rice and a couple of dishes and share. It was all rather confusing for the country bumpkin so I followed Han's lead. Itwas good food, great company and pretty cheap too! After a quick sit down in Leicester square we said our goodbye and headed for a night in Marlow with Guy.
Now, I've never been to Guy's house, but I was made to feel welcome by his whole family, especially Toby - his gorgeous dog.
I was fed, and his mum and sister was preparing for neighbourly get together. I kinda camped out in Guy's room with a bag of crisps, some fine Rebellion Ale, and a PS2 controller. After a few games with a 10 year old at Pro Evo (which I cannot remember the score, damn amnesia) I went to find Guy. He was speaking to a very sporting gentleman who used a phrase you don't hear everyday : "I'm not going to the rugby, as my horse is racing tomorrow". We said our goodbyes and headed to Marlow for a night out.
Whilst it was nice catching up with Guy, it was rather unspectacular night amongst the rather older inhabitants of Moarlow, we headed home about 1, whereby I headed to bed, to prepare for another day with Han, and the final day of my holiday.
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Pizza, Blogmeets and More Rude Waitresses
"The highlight of my trip to Laaahndaaan was meeting Celeste. She is great. I thinks he is the fittest girl I have ever seen - wow. I think there should be a town in Wales re-named to 'Celeste' in some megre attempt to pay tribute to the wonderfulness that is Celeste!"
- Celeste, last Thursday, My blog notepad
I agreed to met Celeste for some Pizza and soft drinks, I was getting more and more comfortable with the underground, so I braved something that shouldn't be attempted by anybody, especially a country bumpkin such as myself: rush hour. I was only going a few stops and managed - somehow - to get a seat. I was early, as I managed to find the restaurant so easily. Celeste was right, it really was next to the station.
I stood outside which seemingly pissed off a number of Londoners and a guy tried to hand me a free paper, three times. I politely refused thrice, and waited.
Whilst waiting I saw a petite blonde that could've been her - the half light made it difficult to see. Instead of walking over and making a tit of myself if it wasn't her, I'd send a fairly safe text to her, to see if it was her. Lo and behold she took her phone out of her bag and read a text! I walked over to say hi when I realised....it wasn't her.
The official Celseste arrived about a minute later. She's just as bubbily and happy as she appears in recent blogs. We got a seat upstairs and waited to be served.
We got served by this Aussie waiteress. Now, I'm perculiar with my soft drink in that I can't drink fruit juices - they're too sweet. So I ask for a orange J20, watered down with soda water. Now, for a bright button such as Celeste it's fairly easy to comprehend what I want. Not so our Shiela. She made a few jokes about it which I suppose were designed to come accross as welcoming but instead came accross as offensive. It affected her tip.
The company was fantastic though, I've never been to Pizza Express, and eating pizza with a knife and fork is very alien to this northerner. However, we talked about all sorts: blogging, London, rugby and boobs. I think I ermbarrassed myself by saying rather loudly "LOOK AT MY BLACK NIPPLE HAIR! DOES THAT MAKE YOU HORNY BABY?!?!". Luckily, Celsete didn't get up and leave me to foot the bill, she found it amusing, which is good.
Celsete, the busy HR dynamo she was, had to run, so we took a picture. We were at Liverpool Street Station, and didn't fancy stopping some commuters to take a picture of us, so a Myspace angle jobby was necessary.
We tried again.
I looked like a pervert in one, and fat in the other. Boo myspace angles, boo them!
Right, Han has been annoying me for the last couple of days, saying "when you're going to talk about me?" She hasn't read or seen this entry yet, so I can imagine she won't be best pleased with it. Next two days will be Han, with side note on London. Trust me, the next two days will explain why London was such a good holiday. You - honest to god - don't want to miss it!
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Thursday....could've been 9/11 (British 9/11)
Thursday was set aside for "get the touristy shite out of the way": see London's most beautiful sights, such as Big Ben, St Paul's Cathedral and
Celeste before my 2 day excursion with Han. It was just by chance I stumbled upon a "free walking tour" of London. I also met a couple of Aussies who became friends during my stay.
The walking tour was very nice - I'm not going to bore you with the details and pictures you've seen a million times before, but I will tell you a couple of stories. All of the pictres from the holiday (including the touristy ones) are avialable on my flickr site. Go there and comment!
Three general observations about London:-
It's not as expensive as I thought.
It's not as busy as I thought.
It's not as racially diverse as I thought.
Don't get me wrong - it is all those things. I just expected to not being able to move in a multicultral sea of people whilst queueing for a sandwich that'd cost the earth.
Also, our American tour guide was a legend. The second American (behind MrManuel) to like football. Not the poxy padded wank-ball the yanks play, oh no, proper football! He was knowledgeable, calling Arsenal's (his team, I can hear Guy grinding his teeth in sheer anger all the way in Marlow) "Ashburton Grove", it's proper name. He called Ashley Cole a "wanker" (I love it when Yanks use that word) and thnking Alan Pardew's celebration was "total bollocks".
Outside St. James' Palace we goot our photo taken with one of the famous London Guards. It was not the trational one with the fluffy hat, but we did have a rather impressive sword. What wasn't impressive was his face, he looked about 12! Bless him, he was a babyfaced assassin
We then went along Whitehall, saw Downing Street and Westminster. Now the cops there scared me with their massive guns,but I tried to ignore it. I did have something to worry about.
From our vantage point, it appearaed as if a blimp was heading to crash into Big Ben. It wasn't just us, two RAF helicopters were watching it closely. It got close.
Very close...
But it thankfully missed, and the helicopters returned to base. In Britian, we list our dates as day, then month. The date on Thursday was November 9th, which - if it did hit - it would've been 9/11. Freaky!
What was freaky too was the whole culture shock. The talk on Westminster was about Guy Fawkes night, which nobody else knew. Odd to be around people that had no idea on Guy Fawkes Night.
It was a cool day. I met a few people who were staying in our hostel who became friends over the next few days, but I left them to look at Buckingham Palace (we skipped it because the toure guide said it was "crap", according to my hostel buddies, he was right), I had to scoot....I had a date with Celeste!
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Back From London Town
Rhys Note:Hey everybody! I have come back from a thoroughly enjoyable holiday. There are hundreds of stories to tell, and I will share some tales on this here blog, not everything I will tell - I forgotten things, and also there are some things I really don't want to share. However, I have kept a notepad for the past 5 days, there will be guest entries from Celeste and Han. This holiday was a crap start, developing - getting better and better - until a very very brilliant Saturday night. Got you interested? Damn straight. Here is Wednesday's entry.
I arrived in London at around 2pm. I was slightly early, but check in at the hostel was no problem. I'll be honest, my room was...rustic. If the walls were a shade of white, I would think it was a prison cell. I was hungry and so I walked to Weatherspoons at the end of my road for some food.
When I went to the bar (like I assumed you'd do in Weathers) to order, I was shunned "Be seated" said the Spanish waitress "Don't you know anything? We offer a waitress service here!" After the food (which had a bitter aftertaste to the rudeness of the woman), I returned to my room, and used my time effectively, by sleeping for a few hours.
I was awoken by Guy ringing me - he was in Londn for the Chelsea vs.Villa game, and wondering if I'd come for a few pre-match pints. I'd have to get over my fear of the underground, and fast.
Luckily, I did. My first trip was short, a few stops to Paddington, then longer trip to Fulham I was with Guy. I got refused from the first pub we went into (two refusals to serve alcohol within a week....not good!), but we did find a pub. Unfortunately for Guy, it was full of Villa fans. I spent only 15 minutes with them, but I already reckon they're the most welcoming fans in the premiership.
After my 15 minutes of life as a Villian, I returned to the hostel bar. I'll be honest, it was a bit like my penis - a lot bigger on the internet than in real life. Nevertheless, they weren't showing the Liverpool vs. Birmingham game (heathens), so instead I wedged myself beside the pool table - and waited for somebody to talk to me.
It was there I noticed something, every single racial stereotype is true! To quote Avenue Q: "Racial jokes appear uncouth, but you laugh because they're based on truth.". The Aussies and the South Africans spend all day drinking, smoking and doing "nudie runs". The Dutch are a bunch of perverts, Asian women throw off the shackles of supression making the Asian men uncomfortable (think of the relationship between Sun and Yin from Lost season 1) and nobody likes the French. So, in this international hotbed of activity, did I make any friends in far off places?
Well.....there's Dave. He's 33, a bricklayer, from Manchester.
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The GATR guide to Confusing Londoners
Yes, I'm blogging on my holiday. It's rather cool holiday, but I'll explain more when I get back. I will share on thing you Londoners can try to confuse your fellow citysmen.
London has two free newspapers, thelondonpaper and London Lite. Both these papers are thrusted on you during the day (read Scaryduck's perception of them....it is based on fact) and are light reads. To find out more about the papers, read Diamond Geezer's views on the paper here. Now, this is for people who have a backpack, so it helps, and it takes two days.
First day. Do nothing - just obtain a paper from a purple fleeced impregnator. It's not hard. I got asked three times if I wanted one whilst waiting for Celeste, by the same guy. Keep the paper, instead of littering the tube.
Second day. Take said paper out in the tube and read it. People give you funny looks - ranging from confusion, to anger, to jealousy. Seems to be a recurring theme I found in London, everybody else's paper is more interesting than yours.
So, in that respect, I'm launching a campaign to confuse as many Londoners as possible. Send me your pictures of you achieving this feat to the usual address, entitled "I confused the shit out of a suicide bomber".
Right, I'm off to meet Han now. Is it wrong to say that I'm horribly excited for today?
Ready To Go
Thanks again for all your comments and e-mails, I'm no longer going on this holiday completely clueless of our nation's capital. I'm still not sure of the exact plan, but fuck it - I'll decide when I get there! I have finished packing as you can see from the image below.
Yes! It took me most of today, but I'm ready for my 4 day trip to the big smoke. Well, kinda. You see, I have been struck down with a cold that won't seem to budge. I will probably spend most of my week therefore infecting as many Londoners as possible with Welsh Germs (which, contrary to Han's belief, did not originate from sheep). Fucking typical, I tell thee.
Fingers crossed I'll shake it, however I'm sure come Sunday I'll have stories to tell! In the meantime, here's a list of things you can do, should you miss me....
Join My Forum!: I'm serious you guys, I fear for the place now that I'm gone. It's been doing so well recently. Alas, I fear that it will die flat on it's arse over the next few days with me not around. Don't let that happen. It is rather fun there.
Join My Toplist: However my toplist has been very strong lately, with excellent blogs joining and contributing. Feel free to join yourself, and see where you rank overall!
Have a goosey's at my myspace! I've put a video up of Jim Jeferries, the guy I saw a week or so ago. It is only short, but it is very very funny. Go se!
Start up a fake blog pretend to be written by me: If you do do that, give me the link. I want to see.
Cry. A lot.
Visit me in London. I won't be completely out of touch (I'm sure I.W.S. will kick in by Friday), so you can email me at the usual address if you fancy a spur of the moment trip to London. Especially Friday. Got fuck all going on friday.
So, without further ado, Big Smoke - Here I come!
See you Sunday....
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London Calling
This is going to be my last entry for a little while, and it's not for sinister reasons.
On Wednesday I start my first holiday in two years, down to London. Yes, I still haven't left the country, but considering all that I've been through in the last 12 months, I think getting away - even for 4 days - is still a horrendous achievement. What's nice is that by going now - not only is it cheap - but it's also slap bang in the middle of so many good exhibitions in London. There's the Game On exhibition, a fantastic exhibition in the Tate Modern consisting of nothing but Giant Slides, and the Christmas Lights are being switched on too! I'm meeting Han (who I'm going to the Game On with) and Celeste from blogging, plus also meeting up with Guy as well at one point.
However, there is one problem.
You see, with the exception of Han and Celeste (the former on Saturday, the latter after work on Thursday), I'm pretty much on my own, with no definitive plans. With Guy it's a case of "whenever you're free, I'm seeing you", but he has a job too. So, I can imagine for large parts of Thursday and Friday I'll be with myself, twiddling my thumbs, trying to find entertainment.
That's where you come in.
What do you recommend I do in London? Even want to do something crazy and meet me? I've got two days to fill and fancy some sort of "alternative" experience. Sure, I'll see Big Ben, Tower Bridge and the like, but fancy something a bit different. What do you recommend doing that's a little different? Remember I like sports, and not a big fan of traditional art galleries and museums. Also, the cheaper the better.
Right, that's your lot. It is my last entry for a while (until I reckon Wednesday morning, which will be a case of "wish me luck!"). I'll still be online. Check out my forum for me posting (and post a lot of good messages yourself, it's turning into a right goer), and I'm also playing around with my toplist, so join that too - I've been writing a few articles about blogging and SEO stuff, which you may find interesting. I've got a fantastic idea for a blog, but that can wait for when I return from me hols!
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Bonnie's New Clothes and Children in Need
Some of you may remember
Bonnie's Op a few weeks ago, whereby she had to wear a collar. We certainly do, and it was heartbreaking to see Bonnie in that state. However, my mum has knowingly and willingly put Bon through more emotional pain, and purchased her this.
"It'll keep her warm!" she said, "It'll stop her smelling like wet dog!" she said. "Bullshit", I said. At least the lampshade was fun as we could chip golf balls into it. What can we do with that? Bonnie looks like she's been subjected to a shopping trip with a Scottish Paris Hilton. Poor girl, you can see the dejection in her eyes.
In other news, in two weeks I'm going to a pop concert! Yes, Children in Need are holding their Wales concert in the atheletics track in Colwyn Bay, and apparently 10,000 people will turn up. 10,000 Bay people in one place cannot be good, hence that's why I've got 4 tickets. Currently announced is The Feeling (Cool), Ronan Keating (Crap) and Jamelia (Who?). But fuck it, it's free, and nothing happens around here anyway. I am the sort of person who sat through VIctoria Beckham and Richard Blackwood's concert, because it was free. Which leads me nicely on to the question of the day.
What would you go and see, if it was playing on your doorstep and it was free?
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Halloween
Let it go on record that I hate Halloween.
It's something about it - the ASBO kids running around the estate blackmailing you into giving you treats (that line courtesy nicked from a poem by Sarah), the fact that all the way through university you were forced to go out and spend money on shit you throw away November 1st. The fact it signals the beginning of "Lets give over as much money as possible to consumerist crap", with masks, face paint and god knows what else selling like hot cakes.
A lot can be said for the costumes - in my day it was generally "Witches", "Vampires" and "Frankensteins" going around. Today it's scream masks (lazy fuckers), Pirates (why?) or whatever is popular on the telly. I give a damn about this non-entity of a holiday that's only one place up on the "Cliff Richard Scale of Holidays" than Earth Day. I mean seriously - if you have to work, it's not a holiday.
If I was king of the world (and here's hoping), I would make sure Halloween always falls on a Tuesday. Why? So I can go to the pub and watch the football. Thank the lord that last night - the mighty Colwyn Bay Super Blue Seagulls entertained Warrington Town in the cup.
Suprise suprise, we went 1-0 up just after half time, we were never in the game, but a flash of brilliance got us a goal. However, on the 86th minute of what was truly unwatchable football, a Warrington player chipped the keeper sending it to 1-1 and, worse of all, an extra 30 minutes of football. Colwyn Bay went behind on the stroke of half time in extra time, and ended up conceding another at the death to lose 3-1. To be honest, it was a meaningless game in a meaningless cup, so - whilst it would be nice to have a trophy - we weren't hugely concerned. Well, I wasn't.
I went home half an hour later than expected, and more than a little tipsy. Turns out that a storm prior to kick off had turned a number of Trick or Treaters away. Long story short - I've got a lot of Miniature Heroes to get through, result!
Question of the day: What is the best Halloween costume you've ever seen?
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